‘Expat Syndrome’ is a condition whereby many expatriates
see mostly either the best of their own nationality and
the worst of the locals or see the opposite.
T Crossley
Expat Syndrome. It’s a condition that can take hold wherever you travel. But, it can be worse with those who move to another country. Are you the person who only wants to speak your own language and hang out with other people from your country? Or are you the person who wants to learn the language of the country you’re living in? Do you want to go out to eat at the same places or participate in the same events that the locals do? Are you the person who negatively compares everything you see to what you have at home? Stop It!
I think your decision in this area defines the type of person you are. And while I don’t want to be harsh here, I think it’s going to be harsh. Either you are the type of person who sees all of humanity as just that. Or you are the type of person who sees yourself as superior to others or even afraid of others. In either of these two cases, you see yourself as different or separate from everyone else in the rest of the world.
This can even be seen while you’re traveling around your own country. Each region or state has their own culture that might be different than yours. Do you just show up, take some pictures, go to the theme park or the theater, eat at the restaurant designed for tourists and then leave? Or do you stay awhile? Do you try to find a restaurant or diner that locals eat at? Do you start talking to people to find out what they like about their area, find out where they go on a day off, look at pictures of their kids and have a laugh?
Wherever we travel, my husband and I try to always eat breakfast at a local diner. The one where people who live in town want to eat at. And while we’re there, we start chatting with the other patrons. Find out what they do and where they like to go in town. It really changes how you experience the area. It takes you out of the tourist traps and introduces you to the local culture. Try it.
What are some tips that you have for experiencing the local culture? Please share your tips below.
We try to do a mix whenever we travel (both in and out of the U.K.) so you get the touristy bits done but you get more of an authentic experience. I try to eat local food etc rather than go for a chain or ‘English’ food when I go abroad too.
I think eating local is one of the easiest ways to really get to know an area. Not only do you get authentic food but you also get authentic people.
Stay at local Airb&bs. Avoid Interstates. Eat local. Walk local. Shop local. Walk the side streets as well as the main streets. We love to drive the “ Blue Highways” of America. We drive a 30 year old mint Jaguar saloon (4door) so it always starts a conversation at a local service station where you can ask questions.
Wow. Yes, that car will start conversations! Love all these tips!
We always try to eat with the locals where ever we go. I do like a look at the touristy spots and often enjoy them. But we do make a point of always getting to know some locals to get the full experience.
Having recently moved to a new country I am trying very hard to fully integrate. I have made a conscious effort to avoid expat groups at this point. I feel like it may hinder my ability to really become part of my new community. So, although it can be a bit lonely for now, I know that it will make for the best experience once I have my language skills honed.
It was your comment in the interview about not being the person who compares everything to their home country that inspired me to look for a quote that fit.
Nice!!
It really does amaze me how many expats compare everything to home. Why waste such a special opportunity thinking like that?? Just enjoy all the new experiences! 🙂
Though I didn’t move to a different country to a new one, I did move from California to Minnesota. I made friends with other “non-Minnesotans.” Not because I didn’t want to have Minnesotan friends, but because it was rather difficult to find them and befriend them. But, over time things changed. It took a constant and persistent openness. It took loving being here, so that those that loved it too could feel it. I know it’s not the same as living abroad, but the differences between a “Californian” and a “Minnesotan” were more pronounced than I would have thought.
I strongly believe when visiting other countries, you should attempt their language, eat their food, listen to their music, etc. It’s the best way to embrace a different culture.
I completely agree.
Very interesting. Any time we travel we try to avoid “tourist” hot spots. How can you truly understand a place unless you mingle with the “real” everyday folks?
You must have written this post for me! I experience all these types of expats and tourists every day, and this for the last 17 years. I have given up wondering – wondering how so many people live here and even after 20 years and more, don’t speak the language. Wondering why tourists pay a lot of money to go abroad and never even try local food, local shops, local beer. The Brits come to Spain to have their traditional Sunday roast in an British restaurant on Sundays – of course, a pint of proper english beer at the side. I will never forget … once a lady complained about a Bloody Mary Cocktail – she was sure (she could taste it!) that this cocktail was not made with english tomatoe juice, which made it taste disgusting to her! Maybe interesting to know that tomatoes are one of our top export products – so I took the Bloody Mary back and apologized for not ordering tomatoe juice directly all the way from the UK … I mean that very same tomatoe juice that has been exported from here to the UK initially …. oh dear. Nothing’s weirder than folks. British people living here and needing any repair jobs done to their houses will dead sure give the job to British companies – while the locals would do the job as good for maybe half the price….and so on. But, if you don’t do the effort to learn at least the basics of the local language, you will HAVE to pay the much higher price to get things done. Why do people leave their own country and carry all their traditions and habits stubbornly with them? The main statement I get to hear :” I don’t have to learn the language, everybody speaks english” The first thing I did when moving to Spain was learning the language! What would you do in a case of emergency? If you would need to phone a doctor at night, for instance? And also, the locals appreciate if foreigners at least try to communicate in their language , no matter how many mistakes you make. You will even get better deals if you become their friend – and not remain just a ‘stranger’ living abroad.
Most people we housesit throughout Europe are expats, most have learned to speak the language of their chosen new home. Unfortunately I find it very hard to pick up languages, believe me I have tried!! Though I do try and speak a few words and apologise to locals for my lack of their language. So many people would love to speak a new language just are unable to do so. We have had been met with friendly and helpful locals even without knowing many words in the local dialect. As long as they know we are trying 🙂
I think that’s the key Suzanne, everyone knows you are trying. In Klaudia’s example, she’s sharing the worst behavior of some people who travel to a different country and then complain when they can’t find someone who speaks English or the food or drink doesn’t taste the same as it did back home. They might as well have stayed home if that was going to be their attitude.
I forgot to mention I do totally agree with Klaudia’s sentiment regarding expats!!
Twenty years and not learn the language? That is ridiculous. And, unfortunately, that’s a person who is basically saying that they and their language are better than the local country they are in. Insert American for British because I know we do it all the time too. I’m not saying we need to learn a hundred different languages but if you’re going to be staying in one country for any length of to.e you should try to learn the language. Not only will it help you get around, it’s a sign of respect..
I love to explore the local scene when I travel. That is where the money is. And I agree if you move to another country you need to embrace the culture. Otherwise, why go there.
Exactly. Why go there. Might as well go to Epcot at Disney World and visit all the countries if you don’t want to become familiar with the locals and the local culture.
We try to find the spot where locals like to go and check it out. We did that on our honeymoon when we went to Hawaii and stayed on Kauai. We loved it. We want to go back when the kids are older. 🙂
I’ll never forget flying home from Paris (Paris!!!) and overhearing some Awful American saying how he could hardly wait to get home so he could have a Big Mac. Of course, these days he could have his Big Mac right there in Paris, Which I guess is kind of worse (!)
My husband and I visited Cuba last year. Not a fast food restaurant in sight. And that’s all the young people were interested in. They wanted the embargo lifted because they want to get a KFC or a McDonalds. Not sure if their reasoning was the jobs that would be available or being able to get the same kind of junk food that others have access to.
Oh nooooooo. So sad!
Like a lot of folks here, I have a rule that we can’t eat anywhere that we could back home. I stay in hostels, take public transportation and avoid making reservations whenever possible so we can take advantage of local things we didn’t know about when they pop up. Speaking Spanish really helps in Spanish speaking countries to make me brave enough to visit little shops and chat with the owners about their lives. If I visit countries of other languages I try to at least learn a few basic sentences so I can be that brave!