I thought I’d poke fun at Moms today with Mommyisms: Funny things my mother said.  But since I’m a mom too, this includes me as well (and probably you.)  That’s right, let’s laugh at the things that come out of a mom’s mouth when she’s frustrated, or when she’s trying to give advice or just plain whenever.  For Mother’s Day 2016, I thought I’d celebrate Mommyisms.

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Don’t Forget To Wear Clean Underwear In Case You Get Into A Car Accident

Yes, my mom used to say this all the time.  Did yours?  I didn’t say it while raising my son because it would always put me into a panic.  I was sure that the one time I didn’t listen to her would be the one time there would be a car accident.

Because I Said So, That’s Why

Oh, there’s no denying that this one came straight out of my mouth.  Usually after a sullen “Why do I have to……?” (clean my room, do my homework, go to bed, etc.)  This was also one of those things I heard many times from my mother, not saying I was sullen or behaved in any way but….

Stop Crying Or I’ll Give You Something To Really Cry About

I don’t remember saying this one myself (no, I’m not trying to rewrite history here!) But I do remember this as one of my mother’s go-to phrases.  With two older brothers, what’s a girl going to do except cry?  And it was usually over something.  A hole burnt into my arm, stitches, concussion or even a broken toe usually resulted in tears and those were all things that happened to me directly or indirectly because of my brothers.

Just Wait Until Your Father Gets Home

This was usually said by my mother after she couldn’t catch us to punish us for something.  Usually by the time dad got home,she’d either forgotten about it or my dad would say, “What do you want me to do about it now?”

Put A Jacket On, You’re Making Me Cold

Yep, the old, “since I’m cold you’re cold” Jedi mind trick.  Usually, this one ended “Because I said so, that’s why” since we couldn’t understand mom’s logic on this one and always questioned it.  Mind you, eventually we did get cold but we were NOT going to admit it.

If You Break Your _____(Neck, Back, Legs) Don’t Come Running To Me

Choose one.  It usually came out of mom’s mouth when we were climbing beyond the first branch of the tree or riding the Tonka truck down the driveway (yes, we’d sit on top of the truck and ride it down the hill.) I’m sure I said this a few times when my son used to set up jumps for his rollerblading tricks.

If I Told You Once, I’ve Told You A Million Times…

This particular phrase could be at the start of any of a number of things like clean your room, brush your teeth, make your bed, clean the dishes, get dressed for school…etc.  The list could go on and I’m sure I said it a few times to my son too.

I hope you enjoyed my little stroll down memory lane.  I’ve heard everyone one of these things and even said a couple myself.  How about you what was your mom’s go to phrase?  If you’re interested in reading more, I now have another post up Mommyisms:  Funny Things My Mother Said Part II and Never Stops Worrying About Her Children.