I saw the phrase “Discovery begins at 50” and it’s been rattling around in my head ever since. Â Granted, I’m a few years past 50, but still at the beginning of the decade. Â And recently I’ve realized that it’s time to do some discovering of myself instead of just going through the motions each day.
How my life looks now is a hell of a lot different than I thought it would be 25 years ago and I know that I don’t want to go into the next 25 years without discovering more about who I am now and figuring out what’s next for me. Â The person I am today barely resembles who I was. Â For starters–I have a completely different husband and my 4 year old is now 28. Â Then I wanted to be a writer of some kind and now, I created a blog to fulfill that dream. Â Back then, I dabbled in yoga, now I’m a yoga teacher. Â I used to be a Republican, now I’m a Democrat. Â 25 years ago, I even dreamed of moving farther north, now all I want to do is move south because I want to be warm.
Which leads me to Next.  What do I want to do for the next 25 to 50 years (yes, I’m aiming high!)  Am I doing what I need to do or do I need to start making adjustments?  And lately, I’ve started to ask that ultimate self discovery question:  What will I regret when I’m on my death bed?  It’s a question that I never paid attention to in my 20’s.  Ha!  That seemed so far away when I was struggling to raise a child with ADHD while helping my parents after my father ended up in a wheelchair  and working full time.  I didn’t have time to think about the future when it was all I could think about was how to get through another day.
But now that my son is grown, now that one of my brothers died too young and now that I’m in my 50’s, that question is starting to resonate with me.  Am I doing what I want to do or do I need to start making adjustments now in order to get there?  Where do I want to live?  Do I want to continue at my current job or try to make writing into a full-time job (something I’ve wanted to do since I was a child.)  I haven’t figured out all my answers yet—still a work in progress— but I do know that whatever I do or wherever I go it will include compromise so that both my husband and I can find something that works for us.
What about you? Â Have you asked yourself the ultimate self discovery question yet? Â What will you regret when you’re on your deathbed? Â What are you doing about it?
You’ve always been one of the most interesting people I’ve known -looking forward to reading more 🙂
Right back at you! I’ll try to keep them coming and hope you enjoy all.
Jennifer, thanks for the follow on Pinterest I followed back. I just had a little read here and thought how well you would fit with our Friday blog party. Many of the posters would be around your age. My blog site is leave me a message if you would like an email reminder when the party is live or if you have any questions. Nice to meet you.
Kind regards, Kathleen
Thanks for stopping by Kathleen. I would be interested in the Friday blog party, thanks for thinking to include me and I look forward to getting to know you better! Jennifer
I totally relate. I, too, have asked all those questions and moved on them. I hope I don’t regret any of my changes I’ve made in the future… I haven’t regretted anything up ’til this point in my life… so, so far, so good. (a lotta “so’s” there – this may be my one regret. ha!)
That’s all we can do. I think that’s the key, you’re an active participant in your own life if you’re asking the questions and then making a decision. I’d be more concerned if we weren’t even asking the questions. Thanks for stopping by.
Hi Jennifer, I am on the edge of my fifties, about to tip over to 60 early next year. What will I regret on my deathbed? Probably sitting at this bloody computer instead of actually living! I left the working world because I had had enough of the tyranny only to find I am a shit boss who is really mean about time off! I am having a major meltdown at the moment so I will have to see where I am when I am finished melting. I really hope that is soon because it sucks. I sat on the bench in front of my house the other day playing Solitaire, the ACTUAL game, not some stupid electronic IPad thing and it felt a whole lot better than sitting in the house. Until I dropped the marbles and they started rolling all over the drive – just like the ones out of my head. 😉
Gilly, I love it when you stop by for a visit. But isn’t the joy of quitting work being able to sit on a bench chasing your marbles? Or would you rather be in a cubicle wondering if you still had marbles?